Brisbane

So this Easter we decided we would visit our friends in the North. Flights were booked to Brisbane in Queensland and we were set to fly out on Good Friday, returning the Following Sunday. It was quite exciting knowing that we would be seeing our friends although being afraid of heights I wasn’t too sure what I would make of their apartment as it was on the 31st Floor!

On good Friday they phoned saying that they were having difficulties buying beers for the evening and, being a sound project manager, I instigated a risk mitigation strategy and went to the pub. At the airport we sat and ate Hungry Jacks (the Australian version of Burger King) and drank another beer. I had a massive Aussie burger, which had beetroot and egg as well as the standard quarter pound of dead animal. Absolutely delicious but somewhat filling. As we waited for the plane to taxi to the runway and take off they announced over the intercom that there would be a meal served during the flight. Now I am used to budget airlines so was not expecting to get fed whilst making this small internal flight, but not wanting to waste food decided that I would eat whatever was placed in front of me anyway. We ordered some wine and were served pasta. I was quite stuffed at this point and was happy that at least Duncan and Emma didn’t have to feed us and we could get down to some partying as soon as we landed. But no, Queensland had a surprise for us. It was dry! That’s right, in some quaint and ancient law it appears that some holidays in Queensland are taken seriously and they will only serve alcohol with a meal. And not just a bowl of chips either but a full blown main meal. Well I was stuffed and there was no way I was going to be able to eat a full meal just in order to buy a beer at the pub. All the bottle shops and supermarkets were refusing to sell booze so it was a fairly quiet first night in Brisbane, this didn’t matter as we were with good company but still I think there should be some kind of warning, maybe at the airport:

“Warning, you are about to enter a backwards state that doesn’t serve beer today so please stock up before you travel”, something like that anyway. As it turns out that the 31st Floor provided a spectacular view over the Brisbane skyline and I wasn’t too afraid to get out onto the balcony.

First day in Brisbane and we had a good look round the city, it’s sort of like a small Melbourne. It has the tall buildings but not spread over the area that Melbourne has so it wasn’t long before we decided to have some fun at a bowling alley. I am terrible at bowling so after two games I wasn’t surprised to find my self humiliated and scoring very poor. I missed the pins so many times that my scorecard looked like a game of numbers hangman, 5 dash, dash, dash, 3, dash, dash, 4 etc. One day I will score over a hundred at this thing. I did get chance to buy a copy of Underbelly, an Australian crime drama based in Melbourne that is not allowed to be sold in Victoria due to the fact that some of the crimes featured are still under investigation there. It’s really good viewing and we watch episodes trying to figure out where they were filmed!

The following day we had a trip to the zoo planned. Australia zoo! The home of the crocodile hunter Steve Irwin. This zoo is quite remarkable in that it caters for indigenous species and is home to Koala’s, kangaroo’s and, of course, saltwater crocodiles. They put on plenty of shows for the visitors and we had fun feeding Elephants, not strictly an Australian species, and getting up close and personal with some Kangaroo’s, feeding them and stroking them in the park. They seem a little lazy to be honest but I suppose when your dinner is delivered by thousands of eager children and adults you really don’t need to run around much. Certainly no hopping! I managed to stroke a baby crocodile, it was in the safe handling of one of the many staff members I must add, I don’t go round trying to stroke killer animals usually.

Then the main event, a carefully choreographed display of Australian wildlife including snakes, birds and crocodile feeding. Steve’s wife Terry was running the show and we were lucky as his children Bob and Bindi were also taking part in the show, with Bindi feeding the crocodile in the arena. A thrilling, if somewhat touristy, few hours out. The one thing I certainly like about Australia zoo is it’s commitment to preserving the wildlife of Australia rather than focussing on the usual array of international animals that feature in almost every other zoo on earth. It is a real tribute to Steve Irwin as they are passionate about saving the wildlife and preserving the Australian continent so that other people in the future will have the opportunity to see these unique animals up close. If only they didn’t have to write Crikey on every piece of merchandise!!

Whilst we were in Brisbane our friends confirmed that they would be moving to Melbourne and that Emma would be coming down in a couple of weeks to start the house hunting for them, having been in this predicament I suspect we will have some housemates for a few weeks, at least in Melbourne you can buy a beer when you want one!

Friends

Busy week last week I can tell you. There are certain things that are taken for granted and you only really miss when you realise they are gone. It is a cliché but it is so, because in all it's overuse, it has a strong ring of truth. This was made very clear during the events of last week. We had Moira's brother over from England and also we had two of our dearest friends staying with us as well, Duncan and Emma.

Now our flat is a small one bedroom affair, with emphasis on the small. We had five adults all staying under the small roof and this was always going to be a bit of a squeeze! Concepts of privacy and space were out the window, which was lucky as there was no room in the flat for concepts of any size.

We met Duncan in London where he was staying as part of his world wide adventure, he is from Tasmania which makes him part Australian (part sheep). I employed him as a temp and we instantly became good friends, I am not sure if this is down to the lunchtime visits to the pub or the concept of doing as little work as possible for the Highways Agency. Anyway we had several good years in London, our complex network of friends growing slightly larger, especially when he met and fell head over heels (soppy enough for you?) with Emma. A delightful girl who takes no sh*t from our friend Duncan, Which is exactly what he needs! Needless to say he was a success with the company and when I left they made him CEO or something, not really but he was doing very well.

When we found out we were going to move to Australia there was much discussion over people who we would be missing. Friends and family we would be leaving behind and ways we would endeavor to stay in touch with them . If there is great happiness and excitement in setting out on a new adventure then there is equal grief in the act of leaving behind friends and family in whom we have spent considerable time and shared some special moments. Weddings, births and birthdays are all events that help bind friends and give groups of friends a link to something special, something shared between them that nobody has experienced or can repeat. Being part of something a little special is a human need and one that is certainly missed.

Don't get me wrong, Moira completes me and is my rock through life without whom I would be never able to cope. But friends sometimes give me an alternative type of therapy. The one thing which we never had any lack of until we moved was friends. For the past five months we have been coping well with the lack of any best friend type people, Moira has made friends with people at work but at the moment they are more like people she knows than special confidences.

Anyway when we announced that we were moving to Australia guess who started applying for jobs over here. And he got one almost straight away, speaking the language probably gave him a head start. They even had to move out here before we left. Unfortunately this job was in Brisbane. Which is a long way away. About an hours flight from here, not so far away as to make life impossible but we cannot call round the pub together like we did in London, still it is better than never seeing them again. And they came, not just them either. Phil and Perry are a couple we know through Duncan and Emma's housemates and they were coming to Melbourne at the same time as D&E! Quite the re-union. they were staying with some friends and we were going to get the opportunity to meet them as well so we could possibly increase our circle of friends in OZ.

Phil and Perry came round and were suitably impressed with our view, making the appropriate level of Oooo's and aaah's that I actually thought they would be really good on a wine tour!! We had to eat fish and chips the first night, way too many people to cook for and it was weird. Here were seven people who nine months ago were running their own life, minding their own business in London and were now sat round a small plastic table picking at fishy bits or chips. And this was the opposite side of the world. Amazing really.

Now when meeting new friends it is never a good Idea to start drinking before lunchtime. Especially when the plan is to go our for dinner. But Duncan was here! And there was beer in the fridge, actually there was way too much alcohol in the fridge to be safe but hey! So we went to dinner later, alot later (after snoozes to alleviate the alcohol consumption). Out to meet our new potential friends. Dinner in a newly opened Japanese restaurant in St Kilda. (Just a quick note to self: When in Japanese Restaurant, talking to waiter, do not mention the following - Kill Bill, Hitori Hanzo, Warm or Cold Sake and Hiroshima). I just continued to get drunker, and drunker. Moira says I was an embarrassment, which is something as she is used to my drunken antics, she really is my drunk barometer. Things were bad. I don't think we made new friends, if anything scaring away the one's we already have. Apparently I have been told I was asking if people liked food! I hang my head in shame!! Still I did have a good time, as far as I can remember and I don't think anyone wants to kill me, well maybe the waiter! Something I said about a samurai sword maybe.

After everyone left we realised that we really do want to see our friends more, so we booked a return visit. D&E live on the 30-something floor of a skyscraper in Brisbane so we are going to go and have a looksy, I am scared of heights so this is going to be interesting.

So to all those people we have left behind, please please send us some e-mails, a card, money, anything really. Facebook is so impersonal and we do not hear enough from you all. Lisa, Dom, Carly, Lucy, Mos, Andy, Jason, Chris, Clair and all others who I cannot remember (joke).

We will be getting finally connected to the phone system here so we will be giving people nuisance calls if they don't get in touch - Remember when you are all tucked up and comfy in bed we are WIDE AWAKE with itchy ringing fingers.

Another superb thing to happen last weekend was the arrival of my newest friend. Our brand new Samsung washing machine. It is a top loading technological god. It works out how heavy the load is and calculates water usage and stuff. It has a detergent drawer and so many lights it is sooo cool. Best thing is there are more controls than you can shake a mangle at but to operate the thing you just press "Start", absolute genius. The manual is a little weird though as it has been translated so I can tell you that our machine has:

For curios washing user incorporated into lid is transparent window device. When machine washing peer through to see progress of washing cycle.

Wow!

As I mentioned we spent an hour in Telstra shop whilst a young man made a hash of using the computer ordering system to request we be set up with a phone line. So soon I will be putting our number on this site. Or maybe just sending it out to a select few, who knows!

Brum

This article is all about cars, and all about driving them. This week Moira’s brother arrived in Australia to visit us and see what we are getting up to. As a result we planed a trip down the coast to the twelve apostles via the great ocean road. This particular rock formation is an extremely popular postcard image and is one of Australia’s great tourist traps. However in order to get to them we need to drive down the coastline, this being such a big country it is a journey that we couldn’t make in a single day so we decided to hire a car for a few days. The hire shop was unlike anything I have encountered in England. Just pay the daily amount and as long as we don’t right-off the car then our only other expense is the gas. When I asked what cars they had on stock I was told I could get a Hyundai for the same price as a Falcon. Did I hear correctly, a falcon, a ford falcon. Now there is a little bit of Han Solo in me and the opportunity of driving anything that can be referred to as “The Falcon” is just an opportunity not to pass up. Jon would have to be Chewie and Moira is of course princess Leia! Next stop Alderaan. I think I have to officially declare, at this point, that my spellchecker is not versed on Star Wars and as such cannot rectify the mis-spellings, so sorry to the George Lucas people for getting any spelling wrong.

In Australia there are two traditionally Aussie cars, the Holden Commodore and the Ford Falcon, both built here and both driven by taxi drivers all over the country. So I am driving in an authentically Australian car and it happens to be named after my favourite starship. I pick up the falcon, no checks for damage or waivers to sign and am told the car is LPG gas only, not petrol. I have never owned an LGP vehicle so it was with a certain amount of trepidation that I drove into the garage to fill her up (all starships are girls apparently). Now I am about to pump highly explosive gas into the high pressure tank in the back of my chosen steed, how does the nozzle work. Do I hold the handle until gas sprays out in all direction like a huge cigarette lighter? No not at all, I simply screw the nozzle to the car and the pump shuts off after the required pressure shows the tank is full. This does take a couple of attempts but eventually I have the tank full and we are ready to drop into hyperspace and shoot for the open road.

First we had to negotiate Melbourne city centre, not an easy task when the directions printed from the web mention roads that are not signposted or even where they should be. After several wrong turns and then abandonment of the directions we were on our way, first town to get to was Geelong, just round the bay and from here onto the B100 and the great open ocean. Most guidebooks will tell you that the great ocean road starts in Geelong, strictly this is true, however it is the B100 that starts here and at this point there is no real greatness and certainly no ocean. The actual ocean road really starts in Torquay. So we drive down the B100 towards Torquay, the road is long and straight and soon I have set the cruise control on the automatic car and left it to it’s own devices. I son realise how boring it is driving down a straight road with no need to depress any of the pedals and start to wonder if I should be in the back watching that old guy teach the kid how to wield a lightsaber, OK I will stop with the star wars analogy.

Torquay is small and really just a center for surfing dudes to hang around in, each year Rip Curl holds their world championships on a local beach, Bells Beach, and this attracts lots of international surfers. Wait a minute! Bells Beach, I have heard that somewhere before. Yes that’s right this is the beach featured at the end of “Point Break” where Bodie is waiting for the 50 years storm to bring in the biggest surf ever. With such a solid movie connection we are definitely stopping there. So just as we pull onto the great ocean road we then divert to Bells beach, following back roads and signs to the famous beach from the end of the movie. I will get the chance to be Keanau Reeves, Jon will have to be Patrick Swayze, and Moira, well she will have to be an extra in this scene. So we arrive at the beach and it is just like the movie, well actually not at al like the movie. You see whilst the movie claimed to be on Bells beach it appears that the beach has been redesigned since the movie was filmed. The stands for watching the surfers is in the wrong place and the whole beach seems to have shrunk a little. It turns out that the film was filmed in Hawaii and they didn’t use the real bells beach at all. Never mind we get out and admire the views, watching the surfers skim down the waves and marvel at the natural beauty of the place. It really is stunning.

Continuing down the road we get to the actual ocean road and suddenly the driving is completely different. I love driving, I have driven across most of the UK and across France and I love the feel of being on the open road. The great ocean road is one of the worlds best driving experiences, twisting round the curves of the country with forest on one side of the car and the ocean, stretching out to the horizon, on the other is a spectacular and thoroughly stunning experience. At every turn we have a new vista before us, bays with waves lapping into them and spectacular views across the ocean. The experience is awe inspiring and something I recommend for everyone. We drive all the way to Lorne where we stop for the night. The room is better than expected and even has a hot tub in place of a bath. The balcony has a sea view and is frequently visited by cockatoo’s.

The following morning we continue down but the road now drops away from the ocean and the drive is more like a quiet drive in England’s countryside. Soon we approach the coast again and this time the road drops straight down into the twelve apostles. The apostles are eroded sections of the coastline that have broken away from the mainland and now stand as towers in the raging oceans. Whilst there once may have been twelve the ocean has reclaimed some and has yet to produce replacements. As we get to the lookout point, along with a couple of hundred other tourists, it starts to rain and initially I fear that our photo’s are going to be a disappointment. I needn’t have worried, the formation are so spectacular it is almost impossible to take a bad picture of them, the rain-clouds just giving an eerie effect to the images, probably unlike anything most people get to see, or maybe not.

After the apostles it’s back to Lorne and another night in the lush room. Then the long journey home. With the sights and the fantastic driving I arrive a very happy person indeed.

But this is not the end of the motoring madness I have in store, as this weekend is the Australian Grand Prix and we have tickets. I don’t think I have to report the results of the explosive opener sufficed to say that the day was a real good day out, very hot and we spent a lot of time taking pictures of some very fast cars, too fast as it turns out for when we check the images on our camera we find that we have a lot of pictures of empty track. Moira did get a shot of Jenson as he drove round the track, as well as pictures of the air-shows and other racing cars. After the race we were allowed on the track and as we walked round I picked up some of the rubber that had been lain down by the screaming cars, by my reckoning, I now own one millionth of a formula one car. We arrived home after the day slightly deafened but thoroughly impressed with the days events.